Cumberland Region Foster & Adoptive Parent Network

 

 "It’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to me," said one parent about the time her foster daughter filed an abuse allegation against her. Most often false, allegations of abuse against parents who foster and adopt children with special needs are frighteningly common. When parenting these special children, it is in our best interest to prevent situations that could be construed as inappropriate, and seek out help when an allegation disrupts our lives.

 

Whether false or confirmed, allegations arise for different reasons. We hope that children who are abused by their caregivers will notify a teacher, social worker, or someone else in authority. But sometimes children whose backgrounds include abuse are highly sensitized to triggers that they associate with abuse. You may just be leading a child to a time out after he kicks his sister; but the instant you grab his arm, your foster son may flash back to times when he was dragged to a room and whipped with his birth father’s belt. As children age through the foster care system, and grow in street wisdom and anger, many also learn that allegations are a ticket out of a placement, a means of getting attention, and a way to keep parents who are starting to get too close a safe distance away.

 

The general public is concerned about child abuse and neglect, but not very knowledgeable about how parents must try to deal with some very difficult behaviors presented by abused children. The media is quick to shine the spotlight on a few foster and adoptive parents who abuse children in their care, and say little about those who are diligently working to improve children’s lives. Once they happen, allegations are hard to live down.

 

The tasks required of foster parents (with regard to children placed with them) and adoptive parents (that adopt special needs children) have become increasingly more demanding in recent years. New legislation, developments in childcare policy and practice, in addition to the changing care needs of children themselves have all imposed new pressures on to an existing difficult job.

 

In caring for someone else's child in your own home, the last thing a foster parent would perhaps expect is allegations of abusing children to be made against them. The realities of modern life however are such that allegations can potentially be made against any adult in a caring role. As a resource parent (foster or adoptive parent), it is important to acknowledge the possibility that it could happen to you and to consider what steps you and your family could take to make this less likely.

 

 

The Network has created a guide entitled “How to Handle Allegations Against Your Resource Home” to provide information and advice regarding:

 

• How to prevent and protect yourself against allegations of abuse.

 

• What parents can do to take care of themselves if an allegation occurs.

 

• Where you can go to get help and support.

 

If an allegation is made, it will be fully investigated without any assumption being made about what has happened. While the safety of children has to be the first priority, foster parents have the right to be listened to as well. Whatever the outcome, the process of investigation is painful for all of those concerned.  However, this guide should at least provide you with the information and advice to best respond to allegations that may be made against you and your home.

 

 

• Handling Allegations Against Your Resource Home   (PDF)

(Note: Adobe Reader 5.0 or higher is required to read this file.  This software may be downloaded free from http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readstep2.html.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

What should the Foster Parent be expected to do if an allegation is made?

 

 

 

The foster parent should expect to